Busting Myths to Master Graduating by Lindsay Liben, LCSW
Gradation day is coming. Around the city, as graduation caps rise in the air, so do fears about this next phase of life known as, Adulting. Adjusting to the new expectations and responsibilities is hard, and unfortunately, the change is also inevitable. So as you pack up your dorm room, we will help you unpack these fear and dispelling some common myths about adulting.
MYTH #1: I better love my job, it's where I'll spend the rest of my life
BUST 'EM: Whoa, talk about pressure! It's normal to hop around jobs, in fact a study by LinkedIn, reports that millennial will bounce between 4 jobs in their first 10 years out of college. It can take between 6-9 months to acclimate to a new job. Also, keep you expectations in check, just because your friend is working at her "dream company" doesn't mean she has her dream job. Most entry level jobs involve some scut work, so be prepared to unpack boxes, run errands and pick up the occasional coffee order. The more your boss values your contributions, the more she will trust you and the faster you will advance. Keep your eye on the long term prize, it's a marathon not a sprint.
MYTH #2: I didn't meet my partner in college, guess I'll die alone...
BUST 'EM: According to the US Census, the average age for first marriage is increasing to 27 for women and 29 for men; in urban areas such as New York, those averages are higher. Give yourself a chance to learn who you are in the post-grad world. After you have a clear picture of your identity, you can move on to intimacy. Dating, like most other social skills, is like a muscle: the more you use it the stronger it will become. Which means go on a lot of dates, flex those muscles and strengthen your abilities, so when you do meet Mr. Right, you are not caught up in your dating-anxiety and can focus on having fun.
MYTH #3: Now that I'm graduating, I'm about to lose all my friends
BUST 'EM: Sure, your social circle may waiver, but you can keep the important people in your life. There is some relief in being able to relinquish any meaningless friendships of convenience, which leaves you time to focus on the ones that actually enhance your life. Don't forget that people can serve different roles in your life at different times, so set them free and if the relationship was meant to be they will return. In the meantime, you are about to enter one of the greatest social arenas: the workplace. You will make some of your life long friends here. Not only will you all be vetted by human resources, but you will have shared experiences, aggravations and overcome adversity together. Get ready to bond.
Congrats on graduating, get ready to embrace the rollercoaster ride, because there is no going back. All you can do is hold on and rely on your coping skills to survive the trip.
Lindsay Liben, LCSW, has a private therapy practice near Union Square, focusing on women’s issues including depression, anxiety, and life transitions. She believes that by helping her patients get in touch with their most authentic selves, they can make choices that set them up for personal and professional success. Learn more about Lindsay and her work on her website.
Gradation day is coming. Around the city, as graduation caps rise in the air, so do fears about this next phase of life known as, Adulting. Adjusting to the new expectations and responsibilities is hard, and unfortunately, the change is also inevitable. So as you pack up your dorm room, we will help you unpack these fear and dispelling some common myths about adulting.
MYTH #1: I better love my job, it's where I'll spend the rest of my life
BUST 'EM: Whoa, talk about pressure! It's normal to hop around jobs, in fact a study by LinkedIn, reports that millennial will bounce between 4 jobs in their first 10 years out of college. It can take between 6-9 months to acclimate to a new job. Also, keep you expectations in check, just because your friend is working at her "dream company" doesn't mean she has her dream job. Most entry level jobs involve some scut work, so be prepared to unpack boxes, run errands and pick up the occasional coffee order. The more your boss values your contributions, the more she will trust you and the faster you will advance. Keep your eye on the long term prize, it's a marathon not a sprint.
MYTH #2: I didn't meet my partner in college, guess I'll die alone...
BUST 'EM: According to the US Census, the average age for first marriage is increasing to 27 for women and 29 for men; in urban areas such as New York, those averages are higher. Give yourself a chance to learn who you are in the post-grad world. After you have a clear picture of your identity, you can move on to intimacy. Dating, like most other social skills, is like a muscle: the more you use it the stronger it will become. Which means go on a lot of dates, flex those muscles and strengthen your abilities, so when you do meet Mr. Right, you are not caught up in your dating-anxiety and can focus on having fun.
MYTH #3: Now that I'm graduating, I'm about to lose all my friends
BUST 'EM: Sure, your social circle may waiver, but you can keep the important people in your life. There is some relief in being able to relinquish any meaningless friendships of convenience, which leaves you time to focus on the ones that actually enhance your life. Don't forget that people can serve different roles in your life at different times, so set them free and if the relationship was meant to be they will return. In the meantime, you are about to enter one of the greatest social arenas: the workplace. You will make some of your life long friends here. Not only will you all be vetted by human resources, but you will have shared experiences, aggravations and overcome adversity together. Get ready to bond.
Congrats on graduating, get ready to embrace the rollercoaster ride, because there is no going back. All you can do is hold on and rely on your coping skills to survive the trip.
Lindsay Liben, LCSW, has a private therapy practice near Union Square, focusing on women’s issues including depression, anxiety, and life transitions. She believes that by helping her patients get in touch with their most authentic selves, they can make choices that set them up for personal and professional success. Learn more about Lindsay and her work on her website.